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Counsellor: Should I tell the truth

Q: When I met my husband, he told me he’d only had two sexual partners, so I lied and said I’d only slept with two men. All was fine until a few weeks ago when an old friend came to stay. After a few drinks, she made reference to how we’d slept around in our early twenties. My husband is upset that I deceived him and wants to know how many men I’ve really slept with. Should I tell him?

Yvonne, Exeter

A: No! I don’t believe any woman should have to answer the questions of how many lovers she’s had – it’s a question that few men can bear to know the answer to.

Besides, if you did give your husband a number, would it put his mind at rest? I doubt it.

Apologise for lying about your sexual partners, but don’t let yourself get drawn into an argument about what that means. Trust me, it’s a fight that neither of you can ever win.

Emma Marlin, Counsellor

 

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