Counsellor Q&A: My friend is a unhappy newly wed

Q: I recently met my friend’s husband who she eloped with six months ago. Apart from having no sense of humour, he was a real penny pincher and was unhappy about my friend and I going shopping together. She seemed very down and tense for a newlywed and, when we talked, stopped short of saying she wanted out. I think she’s in a bad place. Do I owe it to her to tell her what I think?

Kiely, London

A: I hear you’re concern, but I’m not sure she’d appreciate you telling her what you think unless she asks you.

My feeling is she needs a friend who will listen. Ask tactful questions and help her understand how to repair her happiness.

So let her know you are there for her and aren’t prepared to let her be ‘in a bad place’ by herself. If her marriage is over, she needs to realise herself.

Emma Marlin, Counsellor

 

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